24 Comments
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Sally McQuillen's avatar

I am glad Grant Faulkner introduced your slant of light to his readers. As a fellow grieving mother I am sending light back in your direction.✨

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Meryanne Martin's avatar

ISA your writing is stellar. We often think about our wonderful time with you both in Marrakech and at your place .. with warm hugs and admiration. What an author you are!

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Soren West's avatar

🔥❤️🔥

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Grant Faulkner's avatar

Thanks so much for this post, Isa. It was meaningful on several levels. I love the story of you and Daniel--marrying a Deadhead Harvard grad sports fanatic. It could be a rom com. But then the story of your approach to grieving is so deep. I've always heard that the loss of a child can inexplicably split a marriage, and I've wondered how that happens. It's so wonderful (and instructive) that you've established such good communication as a foundation to grieve in your different ways. I imagine that in some ways we don't know how we'll grieve, what we'll need, and then how to navigate doing that together (yet individually) must hold many challenges.

Be well. I'm thinking of you and Bailey. I remember her card trick the first time I met her at the Aspen July 4 parade and the lemonade she was selling.

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Susan Jordan's avatar

Dear Isa, I am sorry as I did not know this was your story... I knew the story just not that it was yours. Beautiful thoughts on loss and love and the evolution of lives living on. I guess we all have our own, I was too busy with my own to realize this was you and what you were going through. I lost my sister when I was 18 and she 16, and then well, the almost the loss of my Husband Darryl in 2022. It changes you I know.. in ways I'm still processing. Thank you for sharing.. my deepest sympathies and strength to your family. love

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Isa Catto's avatar

Alas, it is not just our story. The estimate--and it is an estimate because of the stigma of exiting via drugs cut with deadly fentanyl--is 100k. But yes here we are. And you are so right it is a slow turning and a constant one. Thanks for reading Susan and so sorry about your own losses.

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Jodi rabinowitz's avatar

How blessed you are to both be able to share in your loss while respecting each person’s way of coping. You’re union is incredibly unique and special. I miss you guys. Xoxox

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Isa Catto's avatar

I miss you dear Jodi. I'm terrible at making plans so let's catch up on the phone!

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Alexandra Willins's avatar

Just for a second I was afraid to read this email..but only for a second, because I know you both and see the love that shines through so many of your experiences you shared with us. You and Daniel are a rare treasure- loving you is such a joy and honor.

Your immense ability to shine a light on the darkest of moments brings hope.

To life and to love!

Yours. Alex

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Isa Catto's avatar

Oh dear sweet Alex. Hope to see you soon and thank you, thank you for this!

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Martin Kohout's avatar

Dearest Isa. You and Daniel are an example of love, courage, and wisdom for the rest of us. Thank you, and much love to you both (and your magnificent Fi).

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Isa Catto's avatar

thanks my dear! We are shuffling along but still laughing.

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Pam Shaughnessy's avatar

Your access and ability to communicate your experience is enviable. Thank you for sharing. Your self-awareness and strength has reminded me of my courage to continue on after a traumatic struggle. Growth, shift, and appreciation of continued bonds is possible. You are are so fierce 🩷

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Isa Catto's avatar

Oh Pam, thanks but I got lucky in love. Otherwise, my story would be difference. thanks as always for reading!

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Ken Goe's avatar

I relate to every word of this, and it is beautifully expressed.

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Isa Catto's avatar

Thank you Ken. I got lucky with my husband and I cannot imagine walking this journey alone. I wouldn't be able to write through it without his encouragement. And he's my editor which helps. I am sloppy with commas!

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Lorene Edwards Forkner's avatar

“Because we both were the co-creators of this electricity, this union of DNA, this amazing human—“ this may be the most beautiful description of parenting ever. xo

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Isa Catto's avatar

thank you!

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Julie Comins's avatar

Good grief, I love your writing....your resilience, your big-hearted, broken-open beauty. The way you are holding the contours of your shape-shifting family and miracle of a marriage.

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Jane F Geniesse's avatar

Darling Isa, your ability to express your grief and the beautifully positive way you and Daniel have each together and apart survived the loss of Bailey is comforting to read and think about. . I wish we all had even a tiny portion of the creativity you and Daniel draw on. You give us a lot with these observations. Love XoxJane.

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Helen Schulman's avatar

I love your love! I knew it was there when I first met you two. It just proves that some miracles happen daily. Much love to you both!

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Geeta's avatar

So beautiful, Isa, and with so much clarity.

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Amy Kimberly's avatar

I am so moved by your writing Isa. I feel your pain, as I lost a child as well. You are so good at expressing the changes and feelings that come with that, as well as navigating marriage. Thank-you.

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Isa Catto's avatar

Thank you, dear Amy. I remember talking to Billy Bob about your son and I am so sorry that we are part of the same society. Much love to you!

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